Only 45 per cent of adults in the UK are happy with their love lives

A whopping 51 per cent of people has admitted they have not had sex in the past month

ARE you satisfied with your sex life? Because a new report has shown less than half of UK adults aren't and it's taking its toll.

 

A whopping 51 per cent of people have admitted they've not had sex in the past month. 

From a study of 6,000 people by 'relationship people' Relate, it's been revealed people put so much pressure on themselves to have ‘amazing sex’ they end up avoiding it altogether. 

Relate provided over 20,000 sessions of Sex Therapy to Brits last year - a shocking figure for a nation who don't tend to talk about their problems. 

And the charity have penned a new guide to relationships called the Relate Guide to Sex and Intimacy. 

 

People put so much pressure on themselves to have ‘amazing sex’ they end up avoiding it

  

Psychosexual Therapist Cate Campbell said we shouldn't feel bad about planning sex

Psychosexual Therapist Cate Campbell said we shouldn't feel bad about planning sex or talking about our fantasies. 

She said: "It’s sad that so few people are sexually satisfied and put pressure on themselves to perform. 

"Noticing what is going well, rather than dwelling on problems, is quite difficult when we’re all bombarded with messages about how sex ‘ought’ to be."

She added: "Sex definitely doesn’t have to be disappointing - there's plenty that can turn your situation around so you can enjoy a sustained, fulfilling sex life. 

"What constitutes a satisfying sex life can vary wildly from one person to the next, so working out what makes you tick is a great starting point. 

"People may feel concerned if they haven’t had sex in the past month but there are plenty of other ways to be sexy that don’t involve full intercourse. 

 

"I wrote this Relate guide to help people get the most from their sex lives in a way that works for them."

Cate’s ideas for thinking differently about sex

• Reassess what sex is: People often mean full intercourse when they talk about sex, but sex is about so much more than just penetration. Flirting, kissing, cuddling and even just feeling you look great can be sexy.
• Find your sexual balance: It’s often difficult to fit sex into busy lives, but worrying about it makes it less likely to happen. Sometimes, a reassuring or sexy cuddle may be all you have time for or need and some people are happy with very little sex.  It’s what works for both of you that matters.
• Bear in mind spontaneity isn’t essential: People who come to Relate often say they want to bring spontaneity back to their sex lives but sex is rarely truly spontaneous and busy people sometimes have to plan for intimacy.
• Know it’s fine to fantasise: Some people feel it’s wrong to fantasise especially if it involves somebody else or something they’re not comfortable with. But the whole point of fantasy is it’s not real and just thinking something doesn’t mean you want it to happen.
• Feel free to cuddle in front of the kids: In the past, parents were often taught to avoid showing physical affection in front of the kids but it actually reassures them that you love one another.